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"For some reason I didn’t like the reminder that our chef wasn’t any good. #ShitMyWifeSaysInHerSleep"

"Squeeze my ears. #ShitMyWifeSaysInHerSleep"

"You should learn to fly by the end of the week. #ShitMyWifeSaysInHerSleep"

"I think you get an ‘A’ for effort. #ShitMyWifeSaysInHerSleep #SMWSIH"

"Thanks so much for numbering those tacos."